How to Develop a Feeling of Independence in Children?

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How to Develop a Feeling of Independence in Children?
Imagine your child eating his own food, dressing himself, lifting his plate from the table and spending time by himself at home! How easy would life be, wouldn’t it?

Teaching him to be independent will not only make life easier for you, but will also put your child on the path to being a responsible individual. However, developing a sense of independence in children can sometimes be difficult. Fortunately, even one small step at a time can help them gain more sense of responsibility.

Be aware of your expectations
As long as the expectations are clear and reasonable, children often try to live up to the expectations of adults. If you have too many expectations, they are likely to give up. That’s why it’s important to create reasonable expectations while realizing that the process may take some trial and error. If you’re not sure what constitutes a reasonable expectation, set an expectation that is slightly higher than what you currently see. And keep track of what your child is doing to meet your expectation.

I expect you to get dressed in less than 5 minutes


Waiting for you to put your dishes in the sink after you eat

Clarify your expectations.

Create routines
Most kids do best when they have a routine in place.

A good routine will help them know what to do in a specific order.

A morning routine may include:

put on your clothes
washing your face
Having breakfast
brushing your teeth
pack the backpack
An after-school routine may include:

30 minutes of screen time
doing housework
eating dinner
playing games
Don’t put on your pajamas
brushing your teeth
don’t go to bed

Create a chart
Saying “Clean your room” or “Get ready for school” is a little vague for your child. Children have short attention spans and a child learning a new skill needs specific steps on exactly what to do. Great commands;

Put your dirty laundry in the basket. Then you can fix the bookshelves.

Break it down into smaller steps like Obviously, you don’t want to stand around and manage the task step by step. This can backfire. Creating a chart that explains each step will increase your child’s independence.

You can create a chart by creating a to-do list, drawing a picture if you have an artistic child, or using digital apps.

Shape their behavior
Whether you want to teach your 6-year-old how to calm down when he’s upset, or teach your older child how to prepare dinner for you, try shaping their behavior. Show him what to do. Then guide him as he tries to do it on his own.

Give him positive feedback while he’s working on something and guide him when needed. Once he’s mastered the first step, teach him the next step in the process. The key here is to reinforce their behavior one small step at a time when learning a new skill.

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